So you find yourself deep and madly in love with the most beautiful human being that you’ve ever encountered. It just happened, you met, you fell in love; but heres the kicker; he lives in another state. Oh yeah, that part – quite a crucial piece to the relationship that you have just decided to embark on. How will this work??? Well I asked myself that two years ago and I am still madly in love with the beautiful person that I met in October… well January. That’s a whole other story.
Long distance relationships are definitely not for everyone; I actually thought that I could never do it. However, I once saw a quote on Pinterest that said “I believe in the immeasurable power of love; that love can endure any circumstance and reach across any distance.” This quote has been the beautiful foundation of my love. Even as I write this blogpost, the love of my life is hundreds of miles away…but I’ve never been more happier or more in love.
In thinking about the success of my relationship, I wanted to create a quick survival guide to those in Long Distance Relationships or are on the fence about it. But before reading this – none of these tools will work if the person just isn’t the right one. Hell, how many of us have broken up with people we saw everyday lol. So before you decide that this for you – ensure that the person is actually worth it!
1. Trust /Honesty – of course this is key in all relationships, but moreso when you’re long distance. Honesty creates trust, and of course dishonesty breaks that trust. You and your “bae” need to be open and honest with each other about everything.
2. Consistency – daily texts, phone calls, gchats! — Every. Single. Day. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but absence also can make the heart wonder. So make sure you both are in constant contact. You should tell him/her about your random delicious lunch, or if you’re having a bad day. I don’t think I ever missed a night talking to my boyfriend and most days we speak more than once.
3. Facetime/Skype! – This is a lifesaver! Seriously. For our first year, we Facetimed every night. We saw each other’s facial expressions, and it was just amazing to feel so close. DO THIS OFTEN.
4. Be committed- Don’t get into it if you’re not serious – or else it will be a waste of time. Make sure you both are on the same page about your relationship; this leaves out any confusion. If you two are just casual, then make that clear so that you can date other people. However, if you two are serious about a monogamous relationship, make that clear as well. Lets not break any hearts out here people,
5. Drama Free – This goes without saying in all relationships. But when you’re long distance you can’t just have some make up sex and call it a day. Fights can last longer, arguments can be harsher, text messages are misconstrued, your Facetime will freeze in the middle of your very important point and the loneliness will just creep in. You are not physically together to fix it, so if there’s a problem make sure it’s a legitimate one before you try and handle it and also, try to save it for when you see each other in person. Please leave any and all petty drama out the window. Of course something is bound to come up, but keep it at a minimum.
6. Make Every Moment Count- Make the time together memorable, that week, weekend, day, or even the couple of hours that you see your love – make sure that time is filled with meaningful activities and that its intimate. Try to balance alone time with integrating that person into your world. Have private dates and also group outings to introduce and familiarize your babe with your friends and visa versa. You two are living separate lives, together. So make sure that your worlds can intermingle as much as possible. Create memories, do something cool, cooking something amazing, save that movie you’ve been dying to see for when he/she gets there. Try out that new bottle of wine with your honey. It’s all about creating memories that you cant make everyday together and making up for all of the times that you were the third wheel, or on that solo date to the Christmas party -__-
I hope my little list helps! Trust me no relationship is perfect, and long distance ones are even harder. But if the person is right, it’s all worth it.